SS - WILL LOVE FINDS ITS WAY?(7)

CHAPTER-7

"Payal, tomorrow is your D-day, your wedding! Finally the day arrived, I'm very happy for you" Khushi hugged her from sideways.

"Girls, let's celebrate this night like our college days. Remember our last night in our hostel?" Lavanya sighed thinking about those old days.
"Yes! That day was unforgettable. Though we had exam on the next day, we didn't study even a word. Thankfully we passed!" Payal said feeling nostalgic of those days.
"That's true. At that time, we never knew that we will meet next only after three years and that too on your wedding. Missed you both a lot" Khushi said hugging both her friends and all the three girls held each other tightly and cried.
"Guys, there is still time left for my bidaai. Why are we crying now?" Payal said wiping her own tears and tried cheering up her friends.
"As if, you are going to live thousand miles away from your home." Khushi lightly hit on Payal's head and all the three laughed.
"Okay girls, no more rona-dhona now. You know boys are having 'Bachelor's party' at their place, so why can't we have a 'Bachelorette party' with this? Remember how we planned to taste at least  a sip of this before ending our college, but it never happened." Lavanya announced showing a champagne bottle to her friends.
"What? Are they going to'" Payal asked in shock.
"What are they going to, Payal?" Khushi asked without knowing the seriousness in her friend's voice.
"Relax Payal! They are going to have a simple cocktail party. That's it." Lavanya said cooling down her friend.
"No La, I heard from my cousins that in Bachelor's party, boys will'.um.. will do it with other girls" Payal said with a hesitation as she was not able to think straight.
"What?" Khushi shouted imagining Arnav in that state. She hates drinking and that too when it comes to Arnav, it's too... Well, she didn't have the exact words. Everything flashed in her mind and mainly THAT night.
"Stop over-reacting girls! Nothing like that is gonna happen" Lavanya reassured her friends.
"No La, now I can understand everything. You know Akash told me that he is going to stay in a hotel tonight with his cousins and friends." Payal said with a worried and tensed face.
"Payal, you are freaking out unnecessarily! Don't you trust Akash?" Lavanya asked angrily.
"La, even NK is there. Are you sure that after drinking, he won't..." Payal stopped seeing Lavanya's face going pale. The more they discussed, Khushi's mind stopped working. She wanted to see him right now, though she trusted him. "But why? Damn No!" she rubbed off all her thoughts. She looked Payal, as she spoke "Can you both go and check there, please." Payal pleaded her already panicked friends.
"What?? Why should I go?" Khushi asked Payal, acting cool.
"Coz I can't go na.. The bride should not step out of her house after haldi. And Lavanya can't go alone. Please go with her, Khushi"
Feeling very strange suddenly, Khushi tried to change the topic. But Payal being stubborn in her decision, literally sent both of her friends out of the home to check the boys, giving the car keys to Lavanya. Little did Khushi know that, Destiny is playing its own game with her.
Switching on the GPS of the car, Lavanya started driving the car, while Khushi sat on the passenger seat thinking to where she was heading. But rubbing off her thoughts, she zipped her cardigan up to her neck because of the cool wind blowing. She totally enjoyed the night beauty of Shimla. Thinking to hear to some music much contrast to the atmosphere, Khushi turned to turn the music player on, when she heard Lavanya clearing her throat.
"What happened, La?" Khushi asked with confusion in her eyes.
"Chamkili, I need to talk about something to you." Lavanya said seriously.

 "Tell me, La?" Khushi asked with a smile on her face.

"I know this is your personal. But you know this is killing me from the past one week. Can you please tell me why you broke up with ASR?"

Khushi didn't expect this question from Lavanya at this moment, she just looked at her as she further spoke. "I don't think there is a misunderstanding between you both. Coz, you are not that kind. So, tell me Khush, what happened?" Lavanya asked with a worry on her face.

Khushi just looked away to the other side facing the window, not answering to any of Lavanya's questions. Lavanya halted the car with a force break seeing Khushi's behavior. "Khushi, I'm sure that, there is some miscommunication between you both." Khushi knew that Lavanya is mad at her now coz she called her Khushi only when she is angry. But Khushi stayed quiet making Lavanya more angry.

"You know what Khushi, 'To find happiness you have to keep your heart open, so that love can find its way'. You told me this, years ago. But now I feel that, this only applies to me.  Lavanya couldn't continue her blasting on Khushi without knowing the truth and moreover, she can't bear her friend worrying, can she?

Lavanya started the car again, feeling guilty for speaking harshly with her friend and turned on the music. As she drove silently, Khushi's mind went back to that fateful night.

**flashback**

It was after the party of 'Delhi Fashion week'.  Arnav and Khushi represented A.R. Designs and their designs were well praised and recognized. Everything went well on that day, she never even in her worst dreams thought that, that would be the last day for her with her Arnav. Khushi drove the car back to the home on that day as Arnav was completely boozed up. As soon as they entered the home, Khushi went to her room angrily to cool down her already heated head, but only to be stopped by Arnav.

"Leave me, Arnav!" Khushi spoke in anger, holding her tears not to drop. But Arnav didn't listen to her pleas and continued to nuzzle her neck while his hand reached the straps of her dress. Khushi tried her best to free herself from the drunken Arnav, but it was a total waste as he already pushed her one strap off from her shoulder.

"Please stop it Arnav! Let's talk tomorrow" she replied maintaining the softness in her voice.

"Not today, Khushi. Please don't stop me."

"Ple..as..e" she managed to speak but he already claimed her lips.

She pushed him with a force, leaving a stunned Arnav looking at her. "When are you going to marry me Arnav?" she asked angrily.

"What's wrong with you Khush?"

"Please answer me Arnav."

"Khushi, I already told you many times. I don't believe in marriage"

Determined and cornered, she found the words to speak. "I don't want to be a pastime Arnav, who fits between the pages of your schedule. " She brought the pair of his hands up to her lips, "I want to be your wife, Arnav." her eyes begged him.

And there, it was out. All or nothing!

His gaze searched her face for a moment before his voice lowered to rumble. "Khushi, please don't ask me for that." Feeling hurt with his reply, Khushi ran inside her room locking herself in.

After knocking several times, he finally spoke loud enough to be heard through the door. "Khushi.. Let me in." He resisted the urge to break the door.

But eventually the door cracked open and what he saw both panicked and disturbed him. Without waiting for a second, he pushed the door wider and stepped inside to cup her face. "Why are you crying? Tell me what's going on. And what are you doing?" He asked loudly when he saw her packing her clothes.

Her brows creased as if she were fighting with herself in her mind, "Arnav'" Her gaze scanned his face, as if trying to memorize it. "I can't see you anymore."

"Because of the marriage." It wasn't a question, he knew it. He was ready for the debate tonight.

She swallowed and spoke "I understand the reasons, Arnav. From your point of view I suppose they make perfect sense and you have every right to lead your life the way you want." She turned and left the room saying "So do I. We both can live our own lives differently from now."

Arnav followed Khushi, "Nothing needs to be different, Khushi. Your feelings toward me haven't changed." Standing behind Khushi, his hands smoothed down her bare arms. When he heard her sigh, his mouth brushed her forehead as the alcohol he drank was slowly dissolving in his brain. "And I'm sure about the feelings about you."

"How do you feel about me, Arnav?" When his arms pulled her in, she broke free and turned around. "Like a rich man feels about his mistress?" she retorted.

A bolt of annoyance ran through his spine. "I've never thought of you that way." He said closing his fists tightly.

"If that's true, marry me Arnav! You simply made your decision, brought me home, and expected me to smile and go along?" She backed away as tears edged in her eyes. "Well, I can't." she declared.

"I didn't know marriage was this important to you. I thought we were happy." Arnav tried to stop Khushi.

"I was happy, Arnav. But after eight months, of course I'd hoped for more." She shrugged her shoulders and avoided his gaze. "I probably shouldn't be surprised, you didn't notice what I'm going through.. " She searched for the right words.

Arnav focused on her moving lips which he wanted so badly to taste. He wasn't ready to see Khushi walk from his life, but neither could he give her what she asked for. Maybe a compromise?

"I'm leaving Arnav and I don't know how long I'll be gone."

He dropped the suitcase from her hands. Catching the curve of her waist, he brought her in against his body to let her know how much he loved her. Each word was low and deliberate: "You can't go. We need to work this out."

His thumb stroked her cheeks as his mouth reached hers. Her parted lips glistened as if begging for more, but her eyes fell together and she shook her head. "I'm leaving, Arnav"

He let out a breath. "You are not going anywhere."

With her paining heart, she clenched her fists and then moved to the door. "For once, please listen to me. It's over between us, Arnav. And the truth is, you don't love me anymore."

He growled out of irritation. One hand low on his hip, he moved back the hair that had fallen on his forehead. "If you think, this is some kind of game, Khushi, you can stop playing. Nothing will change the terms. I can't marry you or anyone else."

"No games. I accept your decision." Her mouth very nearly trembled. "Bye!"

"Maybe if you still feel the same, perhaps we could talk about it then." He asked her again, not able to see her leaving.

Her nostrils flared and her eyes turned cold. "I want to go, Arnav. That is final" She indicated the door and before Arnav could realize, she already left.

He didn't like it..not even one bit..but he knew his Khushi will come back to him.

**end of the flashback**

Khushi jerked from her thoughts as Lavanya halted the car. They stepped out of the car and walked inside the hotel and saw the entire guests and relatives of Akash and Payal there. Finally after spotting NK in the lawn, Lavanya rushed to towards him leaving Khushi behind. "There he is, just one minute Chamkili, I'll talk to him and we'll go back to our party at home in five minutes"

** 

"Khushi.. How are you here?" Akash asked seeing Khushi standing alone.

"Oh. Thank God, you came. I came with La" she said indicating NK and Lavanya at a distance. "And also, your would-be-wife sent me here to check you. So, How is your bachelor party going on?" Khushi asked with a smile, avoiding Arnav completely, who was standing next to Akash.

"It's going good. And if you girls leave from here, then it would be even more good. Coz girls are not allowed here." Akash suggested making Khushi to open her mouth in shock.

Soon, everyone joined there and started to tease Akash about the end of his carefree days and making fun of him. Khushi smiled to herself and was about to leave from there and wait at the corner for Lavanya. Meanwhile, a waiter came with a tray full of juices on her way, and Khushi accepted it as it was boring to stand alone. Liking the taste of strawberry punch she drank, Khushi asked for some more glasses not knowing that it is vodka in strawberry flavor. After taking some ten shots of vodka, Khushi walked in search of Lavanya and on the way she bumped with a man.

She rubbed her eyes to look at the person and was shocked to see Arnav. "You? Go out of my way" she said in a drowsy state because of the effects of alcohol.

"Arnav.. Leave me! Don't you dare to touch .." But all went in vain, as he dragged her far away from the lawn.

"Leave me.. I'll shout.." she said pulling her hands out from his grip. But he didn't speak anything. He finally lifted and took her to the room, as she was not in the state of walking.

"What are you doing? Leave me!" she asked again.

"I'm going. You sleep here. I'll go and call Lavanya." He was to leave when she stopped him by pulling his arms.

"Arnav.. " she called him softly. "Sach mein, you will leave me and go?" she asked with her moist eyes, making Arnav's heart stop for a second.

"Khushi, you asked me to leave"

"You will leave me if I asked you to do, Arnav?"

Arnav couldn't understand what was running in Khushi's head, but all that he knew is that, his Khushi is not in her stable state.

"Sleep!"

"Answer me, Arnav. Will you leave and go?" she asked raising herself from the bed.

"You left me, Khushi"

"Yeah! I left you. But you didn't even care to check whether I'm alive or not."

"Khushi, didn't I come and call you back?"

"But what is use of coming back to you, you anyway not going to change your mind" she replied sarcastically.

"What do you mean Khushi? Come straight to the point" he asked in anger.

"Straight? Haha.. You know what Arnav, Lavanya was telling me the similar thing that I'm not open, and that's why love is not finding my way. But she doesn't know that, nothing is going to change if I'm open. It doesn't make any difference. It doesn't change the fact that men in the party misbehaved with me and tried to manhandle me, It doesn't change the fact that they called me to their place for a night, It doesn't change the option of society on how they saw me. It was all BECAUSE of you Arnav, only you." she roared at him while tears continuously cascaded down her cheeks. "I'm open now, has anything changed?"

Arnav stood rooted where he was standing, he never knew that Khushi went through such a horrible condition. He cursed the men who misbehaved with his Khushi and cursed himself for not being with her at that time. "Why didn't you tell me all these things on that night, Khushi?"

"Arnav, if I told you about all these that night, what would have you done? You would have beaten them black and blue, then? You would have married me? No, there wouldn't have been any change or difference. But still, I tried my best to convince you about our marriage that night. But you, you told me to end my game. Is my life any freaking game?" she shouted loudly and fell on her knees with a force and cried loudly.

He too knelt down immediately and held Khushi's hand in his and spoke "I'm sorry Khushi, really sorry. Why didn't you tell me on that day?" Khushi looked at his eyes which were in its deep shade of red. "You were drunk and by telling you, nothing is going to change. Well anyways, you are not going to marry me, right?" she shot back. There she broke the truth. Arnav felt like slapping himself. His own selfishness had brought Khushi to this state. He saw Khushi pulling her hands from his and walking towards the door.

He strode across the room and pulled her into his arms. His kiss wasn't sweet or tender. It wasn't a slow build. It was three years of pent-up passion and emotions, it was his sorry, it was his love, care, affection. It was his everything.  Khushi too gave her everything, with all of his defenses down, and she could give back nothing less.

On a sob, she opened to him, allowed him access to her mouth. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her fingers through his hair, holding on to him tightly. Because if she let go she was afraid she might not be able to stand.

When they parted, they were both breathing hard. Khushi hugged him tightly and she spoke "Missed you very badly, Arnav". He too hugged her back with equal force.

Kaisi teri khudgarzi
Na dhoop chune na chhaaon
Kaisi teri khudgarzi
Kisi thor tike na paaon

Ban liya apna paigambar
Tar liya tu saat samandar
Phir bhi sookha mann ke andar
Kyun reh gaya

Re Kabira maan jaa
Re Faqeera maan jaa
Aaja tujhko pukaare teri parchhaaiyan

"Then don't leave me, Khushi." Khushi looked into his eyes and touched his cheeks with her palms. "Is it paining? I'm sorry, Arnav." She said stroking his cheeks and kissed the same.

Arnav didn't understand what Khushi was saying for some time. He was clueless, totally. Then he realized that Khushi meant the slap of previous Sangeet night. Amidst all these things going on, Arnav felt like smiling seeing the childish Khushi to which he fell for. He cupped her both cheeks and kissed her forehead as an assurance. But Khushi already dozed off. He carried Khushi to the bed and called Lavanya wiping the tears which fell from his eyes.

~~~~~